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In those places teaming with people anything can happen, you can bump into a neighbor, your high school gym teacher, your bunk mate from that summer camp thirty years ago. But I have come to the believe the most amusing things actually happen on those chance encounters with virtual strangers.
Here's what I mean....
THE PLANE- STINKY MAN
You're sitting on a plane you get all comfortable, put your book in the seat back in front of you, get your ear buds ready in case chatty Susie sits in next seat, you buckle up AND.....then the person next to you slips off their jacket and you GAG; holy crap doesn't this person know what deodorant is? Of all the stinking luck!!
THE AIRPORT TERMINAL BAR -MY LIFE STORY GUY
You're waiting for your flight and go to the bar for a beer and a burger. You're reviewing in your mind how you made it thru security without event.You did not get felt up by a big very serious unattractive person...it's your lucky day....THEN the person next to you says hello, you nod politely. Before you even take two sips of your beverage they're already ten years, two divorces and 140 alimony payments into their life story! Can anyone say INDIGESTION?
BAGGAGE HANDLER-MARIO ANDRETTI
You ran to the last gate because that's how it always is when you have a connecting flight.It is NEVER the first gate when you're in a hurry. They're just about to close the cabin doors but they let you in regardless. You're huffing and puffing as you plop in your seat then you glance out the window and apparently you're not the only one behind schedule. Mario Andretti baggage guy comes speeding across the tarmac luggage for the flight you've just gotten off in tow. As he's approaching you spot you're uniquely patterned luggage at the top of the heap. YIPPEE you think to yourself, a bit red faced you check to make sure you didn't actually yell that aloud. Right at that moment your attention is drawn back to Mario who begins to whip his truck more directly in the planes direction and as he turns your luggage hurls in the air and lands like a ton of bricks on the black surface.Say it all together now LOST LUGGAGE.
You ran to the last gate because that's how it always is when you have a connecting flight.It is NEVER the first gate when you're in a hurry. They're just about to close the cabin doors but they let you in regardless. You're huffing and puffing as you plop in your seat then you glance out the window and apparently you're not the only one behind schedule. Mario Andretti baggage guy comes speeding across the tarmac luggage for the flight you've just gotten off in tow. As he's approaching you spot you're uniquely patterned luggage at the top of the heap. YIPPEE you think to yourself, a bit red faced you check to make sure you didn't actually yell that aloud. Right at that moment your attention is drawn back to Mario who begins to whip his truck more directly in the planes direction and as he turns your luggage hurls in the air and lands like a ton of bricks on the black surface.Say it all together now LOST LUGGAGE.
HOTEL-COUGAR,I DON'T THINK SO!
Your twenty something SON has two tickets to a concert and he asks you to go, A friend admittedly his first choice didn't care for this band but your happy to go anyway.You get a great place to stand by the railing overlooking the stage and not to far from the bar. The music is loud and the beer is cold and wet. When the concert is over and you both hit the fresh and air two words become a clear possibility.....DRUNK DRIVING. You glance to the left and VIOLA there is a very large and respectable hotel chain within walking distance from where you're standing. As you're checking in the front desk attendant asks you carefully avoiding full eye contact "Madame would you and your (throat clear) like one bed or two?"
Do you travel? Most people who do have a story.
Why not share it with us.
Your twenty something SON has two tickets to a concert and he asks you to go, A friend admittedly his first choice didn't care for this band but your happy to go anyway.You get a great place to stand by the railing overlooking the stage and not to far from the bar. The music is loud and the beer is cold and wet. When the concert is over and you both hit the fresh and air two words become a clear possibility.....DRUNK DRIVING. You glance to the left and VIOLA there is a very large and respectable hotel chain within walking distance from where you're standing. As you're checking in the front desk attendant asks you carefully avoiding full eye contact "Madame would you and your (throat clear) like one bed or two?"
Do you travel? Most people who do have a story.
Why not share it with us.
HAHA! Awesome stories!! I can't think of a great travel story off the top of my head, but I'm sure I'll think of one as I'm trying to fall asleep tonight!
ReplyDeleteAngela, mom and I usually do that "in the middle of the night" remembering stuff too!
DeleteThese were funny to read. I'm the person that talks on the plane, LOL, incessantly, especially if I can get someone to talk with me since I'm nervous (petrified) to fly, so if I can talk with someone that helps pass the time and helps to calm my fears :)
ReplyDeletebetty
Ha. Chatty Susie...I am Susie, but I PROMISE I would never be chatty on a plane. I'd be wearing the head phones. :)
ReplyDeleteBetty,
DeleteI used to like to chat a bit but not so much anymore. I actually travel much more now and am a lot more used to it and it feels much more natural. Now I put on my ear-buds and listen to music or the news or just read on my tablet.
Susie, I'm taking you on my next trip with me,
I got stuck on a long flight with someone in bad need of a shower once. He sat across the aisle from me, and it was still unbearable! These were all great stories, though I'm sure you didn't appreciate some of them at the time. I'm still laughing at the cougar story!
ReplyDeleteJulie
What I was drinking drooled down the side of my mouth from laughing so hard about the deodorant dude! I think I have a cramp...ha-ha! I can't stand funky people. It's like they seek out the folks who can't stand it the most & get right next to them. Just kill me!
ReplyDeleteJulie,
DeleteI doubt I travel without one good story so I know this stuff happens all the time. That one about my son and I really was funny you had to be there and being drunk really enhanced the silliness of the situation.
Sonya, Stinky men are not my favorite seatmates yet they are flying all over the place and chances are good I'll be smelling one again soon..
HAAAAAAAAAAA.
ReplyDeletewhat did you son say?! Hilarious. xx
Thank you for such great laughs. I'm scared pee-less on a plane, so I don't have any good memories of air travel. :-) I love the hotel story. I'm still laughing.
ReplyDeleteKim and Debi,
DeleteThat isn't the typical mom/son story but we were both hysterical... of course we were drunk so that didn't help one bit!!
That made me laugh! On one holiday my husband had our passports and tickets in his carry on bag for the first time ever as I usually have them, he left them in the taxi on the way to the airport and we had to phone taxi company to bring them back. On the plane I spilled boiling hot chocolate all down my new white top and burned my boobs. The next day I bit into crusty bread and broke my front tooth and had to visit a dentist who only spoke Spanish. The day after that we had a phone about a death in the family and it was too late to fly back for the funeral. The rest of the holiday went well,lol!
ReplyDeleteOMG Anne!
DeleteI can't believe all those things have happened to you and your husband, You do travel a lot so things are bound to happen,but those are some pretty funny things, of course the death of the family member was very sad.