April 16, 2013

A-Z 2013 the letter N

No! Are you one of those people who has a wave of guilt flow through their body when they say that word, No? 

No my "N" word. 

I used to be one of those people!

Then I realized that no was not a dirty word.

That was after I learned from a wise counselor that I could keep my personal relationships intact and say no to my friends and family.

For some reason I had this notion that the two were not mutually exclusive. 

There is hope however. I learned so I share a few brief tips. 

If someone asks you to do something this is what I would suggest..

  1. Think before you speak. Try taking a deep breath before you say anything. If not yes might some flying out of you mouth and you could be the PTA president for the 12th time!
  2. Say yes and no at the same time. How you ask? Tell your friend, boss or pastor.."Thank you so much for thinking of me however I'm afraid I just don't have time this month. I am available next month for such and such an event or project."
  3. Check your calendar so you don't overbook, remember to think of yourself (you are allowed) and don't spread yourself to thin.
  4. Always be polite but always be firm and mindful of your body language. 
  5. Never say your sorry. If you do it sounds like you've done something wrong! 

And remember; saying no is never wrong.

As I was poking around the internet I came across a priceless story that I thought I'd include in this post. This is a perfect illustration of a person who had no problem saying no...to anyone!

Read it and giggle...

John Galbraith’s housekeeper was a whiz when it came to saying no. One day in 1965 the noted economist was taking a nap when President Lyndon Johnson called his home. “He’s taking a nap and has left strict orders not to be disturbed,” his housekeeper told the President. Johnson replied, “Well, I’m the President. Wake him up.” Her response? A simple: “I’m sorry, Mr. President, but I work for Mr. Galbraith, not for you.” Then she hung up. (this segment is a link to the full article)
Do you have problems saying no? -or- Have you found your comfort zone with the no word?

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  1. There are some things that are very difficult to say no to, but I think I have a pretty good feel for what my prioities are. Family almost always comes first! I've wanted to be more involved with my kids' schools, but sometimes you just have to say no.

  2. I find it very hard to say 'no' but have started practising it a bit more. The other day I said 'no' to helping out and then felt so guilty I had to phone my husband at work and talk to him about it. He agreed with me and reassured me that I had done the right thing.

  3. I'm pretty good at saying no now, but it's a lot easier when I don't have to do it in person. Sometimes I get caught off guard and my reply can be awkward!

  4. Lord have mercy...this is one of my worst traits. Seriously...and my potty mouth in the form of written word.
    I am a people pleaser and am terrified to say no because I worry about hurting feelings.
    I remember working in the ER and taking on way too many case loads. I would go without breaks.
    These are great tips my friend.

    1. But it made you a great nurse i bet!

  5. I used to struggle with this as well, and while I have learned much I also know I have further to go yet.

    1. Appreciate you sharing your experience with us Stacey.

  6. It took me a while to learn to say no, I always felt guilty. Then I had four kids and didn't have time to do anything else. That's when no became easier.

  7. The older I get the better I am at saying NO! If it comes off wrong, I'm covered with, "Bless her heart, she's getting old and cranky" or "she didn't really mean it. I'll ask her tomorrow when she's in a better mood."

    Thoughtful post and good advice...even if your speaking to The President.

    My Letter 'N'...Needle Nests
    Sue CollectInTexasGal
    AtoZ LoneStar Quilting Bee

    1. I think it really does come with age is has for me too!
      Unfortunately so did a touch of old-n-cranky; darn :)

  8. I laughed at that story. I have a terrible time saying no I always feel I have to make excuses.I hate when I'm asked,"What are you doing on ...day?" Instead of just saying what they want,it's usually babysitting. I look after my friend's grandson 2 days a week and have done since he was born he's nearly three now but sometimes his mum expects too much and asks me to babysit on a Saturday night, I have said no a few times but always with an excuse.I love him to bits but I'm not getting any younger I need a rest sometimes,lol.

  9. I Have such a hard time saying no. I'm learning to be better about it though. I overextend myself too much!! Happy A-to-Z 2013! ~Angela, Whole Foods Living, http://www.wholefoodsliving.blogspot.com/

    1. Overextending! I hate that feeling. I've done it tons of times and that's was my light bulb moment when I felt I needed to change how i approached my responses to peoples requests

  10. As I've gotten older, I've learned to say 'no' pretty well:)) good word choice!

  11. Yep, I have trouble with no. But I'm getting better at it.


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